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User blog:Itermin8rX/Ways to have fun at a supermarket
Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations. #Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store. #Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day. #Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join in. #Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners. #Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. #Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters. #Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit. #When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles. #Tell an employee in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens. #Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10". #Play with the automatic doors. #Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!..." etc. See if they play along. #Walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this junk, anyway?" #Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department. #Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a "test drive." #Follow people through the aisles, staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department. #Play soccer with a group of friend, using the entire store as your playing field. #As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!" #Put M&M's on layaway. #Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas. #Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows. #Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles. #Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon. #Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "...I'm Batman. Come, Robin--to the Batcave!" #Toilet paper as much of the store as possible. #Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles. #Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down. #When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?" #When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!" #Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men. #Take bets on the battle described above. #Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics. #Hold indoor shopping cart races. #Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission: Impossible." #Attempt to fit into very large gym bags. #Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags. #Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?" #Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store. #Two words: "Marco Polo." #Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc. #"Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics. #When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word. #Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out. #During announcements over the PA, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!" #Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time. #Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. #If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it. Category:Blog posts